Sometimes I get so wrapped up in this lifestyle, the World Race, that it is easy to forget that people back home have no idea what it is that I am doing. I forget that you did not watch a thousand videos about the race, or read hundreds of blogs like I did before I came on this trip. I forget that just because I see all of my friends posts about the race that the people on my blog or Facebook don’t see those as well. I can get caught up in comparison and not wanting to write a blog because I feel like it is not good enough to share. But I realize none of that is fair to the countless people that are supporting me back home, either through prayer, following my journey, love, and/or financially. I want to say a HUGE thank you to all those supporting me back home and take a moment to say I am sorry for not keeping you more updated!
This life has been nothing like I thought. First of all, when I thought of a missions trip I pictured building houses, maybe schools, digging wells, teaching English, preaching the gospel, and doing kid’s activities. I think I was expecting to do and see things that felt more productive to me. Things that looked more tangible so I could have something to show people back home. But honestly this life doesn’t really look like that. While we have done many of these things, this trip has been more of a discipleship program. That means that yes we are pouring out love and Jesus to the world this year, but we are also being molded and grown and changed permanently so that when we come home our race is not over. It is actually just beginning. I am being trained up as a disciple of Jesus so that wherever I go I feel equipped to be able to share the gospel. I know how to pray for people at the drop of a hat and I have developed confidence to do it. I know how to trust in the voice of the Lord so that I can listen to his guidance every day of my life, for the rest of my life. This means that not only am I able to impact people this year, but I can continue this mission God started in me for the rest of my life wherever I go, whether I am in the USA or any other country. I now know how to love people well. I am also always still learning how to do it, but I have learned how to let God lead my life and that is what this race has really been all about.
I have experienced so many things on this race I never thought I would see in my lifetime. Many of them can not be pictured for the safety of the people we encounter and I have struggled with telling certain stories as not to exploit people but I want to share with you all some of the beautiful ways I have seen God move this year.
Most of the things I have done I have felt very unqualified for. But I have learned the very important lesson that God will show up in everything He invites us in to, all we have to do is say yes. My yes has lead me to the most incredible experiences this year and led me to finding my purpose in Him. I have worked with countless churches, preached many sermons, taught in a bible school, danced with hundreds of kids, led worship in every country I have been in, grown extremely in my confidence to lead worship, written many songs, (some in other languages!), painted many many walls, built concrete walls, worshipped in abandoned airplanes, prayed over hundreds of people, seen many people healed, seen many people come to christ, taught in schools, played countless games with countless kids, worshipped and spoke life into many people in jails and seen God bring so much joy and freedom to so many different types of people.
I have also been apart of and seen many dark and heavy things. I have fought many dark spiritual atmospheres with worship and prayer (please feel free to ask me about this if you want to know more!), I have lived with people who struggle to have enough food or water, and who live every day without any of the things we consider basic needs in the US. I have seen people ruled by dark spirits and things we would only consider myths and make-believe back home. I have lived in the capital and birthplace of Voodoo, and have experienced all the darkness and weight that comes with it. It is so easy not to believe in it in the States but I can tell you it is very real in parts of the world. I have fought many night terrors and sicknesses in these places. I have seen children trafficked right in front of me and I could not physically do anything about it, I have talked to and prayed over people caught in sex trafficking, I have had my heart broken over countless stories of children abused and abandoned, I have wrestled with God over how broken and dark this world could be and many times questioned how I could possibly be doing anything to help if I could not physically rescue them. I lost two family members that are very close to my heart within a few weeks of each other, and I could not go home for the funerals. I could not be with my family during this heart break and it was the first time I truly wanted to leave the race and go home.
But God never failed to show up.
It was through all of these things that God has shown me my purpose in this life. It is through these experiences I realized just how important freedom is, not only to me but to God. He sent Jesus for the purpose of setting us free from the hold sin has over us. Not because He expects us to never sin again, He knows that will not happen, so instead of rejecting us, He loves us so much He sent Jesus to take all of the punishment. So no matter what we do in this life, no matter the choices we make and the cards we have been dealt, we ALWAYS have a clean slate in Jesus, we only just have to believe in him. I still can’t get over how truly good that is, and how much I don’t deserve it. God continues to show me that even though I may not be able to physically break these people out of bondage, I can help them find freedom from their spiritual and emotional bondage through Jesus. And the way He is showing me how to do this is through worship. Not just music, but actually connecting our hearts to God’s heart, whatever that may look like for a person.
This year I have seen so many people come to find their freedom in Worship, and also the power of worship and how they can use it to fight off whatever darkness tries to take them down. Everyone from kids to church leaders, to prisoners, to teachers, students, adults, teenagers, and even my own teammates and squadmates. God has let me be a part of bringing so much freedom in to the world around me and I am just constantly in awe of how good He is. I can’t say it enough. I sing it all the time (shoutout to King of My Heart haha).
So thank you for supporting me because you are not only supporting this year but you are a part of impacting the Kingdom of God for the rest of our lives, and ultimately eternity. This is about so much more than the Race, it has helped shape and change me forever to be confident in loving people well, and helping them find freedom in the love of Christ.
I could not have done any of this without you all, so please know your love and support has meant the absolute world to me and I am so sorry I have not done a great job of showing that!! You are all making such a big difference in the lives of people around the world and I can’t thank you enough for choosing to say yes and being a part of this journey!!
*I am so close to being fully funded!! I am only $2,500 away and then I am done!! Please help me with this final push so I can stay on the race and continue to help people find freedom in Christ! We have already raised $16,200, which is absolutely mind blowing!! Thank you so much for all your help and support!! We are so close to being done, anything helps, so please consider donating if you can!! Thank you SO SO much!!
