Haaaave you met John?

One of the days of training camp we were asked to go evangelize. Like, go in to neighborhoods and knock on doors and ask if we can pray for people. What?! You mean I’m now one of those people I always ignored or pretended like I wasn’t home for?! You can say my heart jumped in my throat just a little bit. 

 If I, who already loves Jesus, didn’t want to talk to people coming to my door how much more would other people want to slam the door in my face?

 Luckily, we have some awesome leaders who explained to us, it’s not about proving people wrong or even trying to convert them. It’s about just loving on people and praying for them, and inviting them into a loving relationship. 

 Alright, I can love people. I feel pretty decent at that, and what I lack, I know God makes up for. 

 I realized I didn’t have to be right, it wasn’t about proving a point. It was about letting people know they were seen, heard, loved, accepted, and cared for, and that is something I could for sure get behind. 

 I happened to be wearing my giraffe onesie that morning so I decided that I was going to go out into the neighborhoods wearing it. At first, I was unsure whether or not that was a good idea but I felt like God was going to use it somehow, and I didn’t want a fear of looking silly to keep me from a cool opportunity for connection. So I wore it proudly out into the streets of Gainesville with my awesome team and squad.  

 We walked down the main street and broke off into teams of 2-3 people as to not be an overwhelming presence at somebody’s door. The first 4-5 houses nobody answered, but we decided to pray over the houses anyway. Honestly, I think it really helped me to connect with the Holy Spirit and what He was doing in that neighborhood without the fear of people being there at first. 

 After a few houses, and some random runners we briefly talked to, we finally came upon a house that didn’t exactly fit in with the rest of the neighborhood. There were several cars in the driveway and the yard was overgrown with a copious amount of tools, and scraps strewn about the front porch and yard. It was quite an eclectic looking house and honestly when we decided to walk up to it, I was a little nervous as to what we would find. The old me would have for sure let someone else go instead but I was feeling particularly brave in this moment. (Thank you Jesus!)

 As we approached the house I noticed a sign on the door that said “No smoking, Oxygen in Use” and immediately questioned whether the person that lived there would even be able to answer the door. But I knocked anyway, and this tall 6’ 4” man answered the door, a little baffled to see 2 beautiful young women and a giraffe on his porch. 

 We introduced ourselves and then asked if he needed any prayer for anything. He responded with “No, I pray every day, I’m good”. It really struck me how everyone we had talked to up til that point didn’t recognize their need for prayer. If they weren’t struggling with something major, they didn’t think they needed any help, or maybe they didn’t think they were worthy of asking for help. There is also the possibility they were just uncomfortable being prayed for by a giraffe… that’s still out for debate. 

 We continued to talk to John about his life and at one point he stops, looks at me funny and just laughs. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess he doesn’t see giraffes on his porch everyday. He then said he would come talk to us out on the porch. He told us more of his story that he was in a car accident and has some serious scars to show for it. He told us of his struggles with alcohol, pains he had with his daughter, and that he grew up without a father. 

 As we were asking him questions and sharing part of our stories, he stops mid-story and reaches into his pocket and pulls out all the money he has. As he opens it up, it equates to 3 $1 bills that he unfolds and says “Here, there is one for each of you, hopefully this will help get you somewhere”. To say I was shocked is an understatement. He gave us, strangers, everything he had. It may have not been a lot in a numerical sense, but it was one of the greatest gifts I have ever received. This man who we barely knew, who didn’t have much to give, gave us everything he had because he saw Jesus in us. He told us multiple times, over the course of being there, that we were radiating beauty and love to him, and in lesser words, we were radiating Jesus. After a little while, I asked if we could just pray a blessing over him. 

 He said “Sure!”, and sat in his chair and held his hands out straight in front of him, almost in a zombie-esk sort of way but with someone who was ready to receive love. Two of my teammates Vanessa and MeMe held his hands and I put my hands on his shoulders and we just prayed for freedom over him. Freedom from the pain he had been through, from the struggles he was going through and from the expectations his family had put on him to be something he was not. We reminded him whose child he really is, and how ridiculously loved he is now and has always been. 

 He began to cry, and we just watched these walls fall down. He apologized for crying, as he saw it as a weakness and the first words out of my mouth were “Jesus wept”. One of my favorite verses in the bible. We let him know it’s okay to cry, to feel, and to let God in to all of it. I think it was the first time someone had given him permission to feel his emotions in a really long time. 

 As he sat up, he then started looking at me. Staring into my soul in a way I cant really put into words. I felt Jesus in me just staring back into his spirit, with so much love and adoration that I could never come up with on my own. He just stared at me for a few minutes and I know God was speaking straight to his spirit so I just stayed put and let it happen. I was not about to let myself get in the way. After a few minutes, he said “I know you, like I really know you”. I didn’t have words to say it then, but I knew he was talking to Jesus and He was saying it right back. I know in that moment, John felt known, seen, heard, loved, and accepted. 

 Then the rest of our team started walking by and waved to us. John asked “Who are they?” And we explained they were our friends. MeMe asked if he would like to meet them, and in the sweetest way he said “Well I wouldn’t say no!” 

 John was thrilled to have so many new friends and so many people that clearly just cared about loving on him. Maddy then asked him if he had any pain in his back, to which he showed us the scoliosis he had surgery for that still overpowered his back. He said he had pain every day. Maddy so kindly asked if he would be open to us praying for him. What she didn’t know was the entire journey Vanessa, MeMe and I had just been on with him and how he had opened up to prayer through the process of us talking to him. 

 He immediately said yes and got down on one knee and bent over with his hands on the ground so that we could lay hands on him to pray over his back. It was the most humbling position I had ever seen someone put themselves in. The visual of this 6’ 4” man that was not open to prayer, now on all fours because he believed in this prayer thing so much, was the most awe-inspiring experience for me. It’s actually difficult to put into words how humbled I was to just be able to be a part of that experience with him. 

 We spent some more time just talking with John but at some point we had to leave, and told him we would continue to pray for him and check in on him. He was so incredibly happy to have us there and honestly I think I left even more touched by his heart and his story. 

 As we walked back to our cars, we talked to other neighbors and let them know about John, where he lived and asked them to continue to pray for him and connect with him. I am a firm believer in community and honestly there was already so many people in that neighborhood that were just looking for other people to be in community with, they just didn’t know it yet. 

 I thought this day was going to be terrifying but I left so pumped on love and life and realized this life is just about loving other people and letting them know how valued they are. That has been on my heart ever since I was little and I was finally finding the confidence to just live it out. 

 God is so good and I can’t imagine what I have missed out on already because of my own insecurities. People need people. People need love and I get to show them both. I am still in awe that this gets to be my life. I get to be a part of God changing hearts from feeling lonely, broken, and unimportant, to feeling seen, known, loved, and accepted. That is what God is really about and I get to be a part of sharing that around the world!! 

Thank you, John, for letting us into your life, sharing your story, and letting us be a part of God taking a hold of your heart. You have truly inspired me, and I will always be blessed by the ‘One Big Freakin’ Ray of Sunshine’.